Being neutral doesn’t mean you are passive. Good facilitators know when to pull the group’s attention toward them and when to step back and get out of the way. You should take a seat or otherwise get out of the way when a group is talking well about its content (aka topics of discussion). “Talking well” means reasonably balanced participation from all members in a conversation that appears to be generating ideas and understanding. When the group is NOT talking so well, then it’s time to stand up and fulfill one of the Functions of a Facilitator: Teaching New Thinking Skills.

When your group is struggling to integrate its different lines of thinking into some coherent direction, they are probably in the “Groan Zone”. This is where you can become useful to the group by teaching them different ways of talking that can help them find their way through. Some of these new thinking skills can include exercises that help them come up with “both/and” ideas for dilemmas, brainstorms, structured go-arounds and identifying underlying needs.

Implicit in all of this is the assumption that you trust the group to be able to come up with good ideas for meeting its goals — good enough that they don’t need you to be involved in the content and thinking up solutions. There are probably more than enough people in the circle to do that part of the work. What they need most is someone who can help them talk to and hear each other. As an advocate for good process, you are very engaged and even directive with your group.